So tonight we did a bit of fortune telling. Lily, 9 year old, guided me through my session and read my cards.
So basically, there were around 50 cards, I had to shuffle them, and then pick 3 cards, each would represent my past, present, and future. My future card was titled ‘Time to decide’ and it meant that whatever I do, I should trust the universe and keep following my heart and intuition.
When quitting my job 1,5 year ago I never thought I would travel for so long. I am 28 years old and have no clue what I want to do with my life. During all those 1.5 years of travelling I had at least 3 serious moments when I thought to myself it’s time to get back to normal life and look for a job. That was more like the voice of responsibility speaking through me rather than me really wanting to settle down. I have been living with these conflicting voices for the past few months and even though I have been travelling and enjoying life, I still stressed a lot over THE DECISION that I needed to take sooner or later. I have applied for several jobs recently, however deep inside I wasnn’t sure whether this is yet the time for me to stop travelling. I don’t really know what this feeling is but it tells me ‘not yet’. It definitely isn’t laziness, as to be honest, I do need to have some projects going on in my life to give me a sense of purpose and make me grow. But really, this feeling comes from the heart. I would feel incomplete (I think that’s the perfect word to describe how I would feel) if I stopped travelling now. Sometimes I just feel insecure because I am not sure if the moment when I say ‘it’s enough’ will ever come, and if it does, when it will be.
In the past few days I got invited for a job interview as well as to sail the Bahamas. My heart tells me to pursue the adventure and I feel that somewhere out there, there is something waiting for me. I just don’t know what it is, where it is and when I will find it. I just feel that it is out there. And you know what – I am going to find it. In the last 2-3 weeks the universe gave me enough signs to trust it. And the more I trusted it, the better things turned out for me. I know that right now I just need to stop worrying about the future and let the universe do it’s magic.